L is for Love Languages.
Do you know your love language? Do you know your partner’s? How about your kids’?
The author, Gary Chapman, posits that everyone speaks a distinct “love language” similar to how people can speak different spoken languages. He explains that, while each of us can feel good by being shown love in any of the five languages, only one or two languages really fill a person’s “love tank” (like a gas tank).
The five love languages are as follows:
My love languages are quality time and physical touch. When Jeremiah spends time paying attention to me–talking, building a project, playing a game…anything where spending time with me is his whole focus–I feel fully and truly loved and cherished. I’m on cloud nine! Needless to say, my love tank gets full quickly when he gives me quality time.
My number two love language is touch. I love to touch and be touched. I love hugs, snuggles, back rubs, holding hands, etc. Lots of caressing will fill my love tank (albeit slightly more slowly than J`s full attention).
Sex had components of both of my love languages, so a good, intense love making session can give my tank a very satisfactory filling. Quickie sex, however, doesn’t do much for me as there’s little “quality time” involved and the touch is pretty utilitarian. I’m not knocking quickies–on the contrary, sometimes it’s all we can get and I’m thankful to squeeze in any couple time. Quickie sex is like putting just enough gas in the car’s tank to get home: it does the trick, but will need to be followed up pretty quickly with a fill up.
Knowing my love language, my hubby`s, and my kids`, has really helped me know what each person needs in our household. If you haven’t done it before, I recommend you take the love language online quiz. You might be surprised at the results!
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