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T is for Tit for Tat.

According to www.thefreedictionary.com 

tit for tat

n.
Repayment in kind, as for an injury; retaliation.

It’s easy to fall into a tit-for-tat mentality in any relationship, whether with a parent, boss, child, friend, spouse, or (fill in the blank).  It can be so damaging.  It’s not the actions necessarily that are so problematic, it’s often the attitude behind the actions.  I know I can put a spiteful spin on anything–double-edged thank you note, anyone?

I don’t want to do this dance with my husband.  I want to be kind to him regardless of how he’s treating me (or more likely, how I’m perceiving his actions).  Jeremiah is malicious extremely rarely (verging on never), but I often accuse him of spiteful or malicious motives behind his actions.   I have a hard time taking people or their representations at face value.  I see the world this way because of issues in my past and there was broken trust between J and me early on in our marriage, which makes things complicated...

The golden rule is to do unto others as you would have them do unto you, NOT do unto others what they have done to you.  I need to do right by Jeremiah regardless of how my emotions are interpreting the situation, and give him the benefit of the doubt, instead of indulging in the easy, tit-for-tat way.

This spanking blog challenge is being undertaken by several blogs. If you want to read others, click the link below to go to the blog hop.

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