Twas the night before wifey
And all thru the house
Not a pussy was stirring
Not even a mouse

When all of a sudden
There arose such a clatter
My penis got up
and went up the ladder…

Jeremiah came in the door from work and greeted me with this version of the “Night before Christmas” poem this evening, fraught with sexy, rather than yuletide, joy.

I found the whole thing quite entertaining, especially with the looks and tone and … choreography? with which he delivered his little speech. We laughed together at his silliness, and it felt wonderful!

Last night, we had a heart to heart.
I grumbled to him that I felt like I didn’t matter to him. “You say you love me, but I don’t feel like you love me.” He said our marriage was broken and needed to be fixed but he didn’t know how. I asked him if he even wanted to fix it…if I was worth it. “You fought for me once upon a time, am I still worth it to you to fight for me now?”

He said the three little words that I hate, “I don’t know.” He uses those words quite often to avoid telling me something I don’t want to hear. Delving deeper, I learned that he feels like all we ever talk about are troubles and problems and bills. It’s overwhelming him.

To address his feelings, we have decided to try a weekly “business meeting” during which we will discuss any issues that need to be handled (like needing to call the exterminator). Urgent issues will still be handled right away.

To address my feelings, he has agreed to try not to ignore me.

So today, he has gone out of his way to show me a few minutes of attention (maybe 10 mins total), which made me feel truly loved. For my part, I have done the impossible and held my tongue, choosing instead to start a list of items I’d like to discuss with him at our first business meeting. (I really do need to call the exterminator!)

We both seem to feel better about things this evening. So far so good! šŸ™‚

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